Micron overheard something about a cognitive evaluation coming up for tomorrow’s Story Sunday dog blog post. He’s trying to play it cool, but I think he might be just a little bit worried.
I’ve tried to tell him that studying is not necessary. He just has to be himself.
And besides, Micron reading about the derring-do of Rin Tin Tin is like me watching American Idol or something.
We both can casually wave a paw or hand and say, sure I could do that. But the truth is a harsh mistress. And like the proverbial “kept woman” she’s a tough bird to kick out.
So, just be you, Micron. And it will be just fine, you’ll see.
Category Archives: Micron
Wordless Wednesday: Grasshoppa
Hey Grasshoppa, says Bodine. Quickly as you can, snatch the pebble from my hand.
Ain’t gonna happen, says Micron.
No, really, says Bodine. When you can take the pebble from my hand, it will be time for you to leave.*
You know what, Master Po-dine? says Micron. The last time I tried playing tennis ball with you I got shredded.
Because you’re too slow. That’s all, says Bodine. You just need to practice more, my young student. Here, try to take the ball from me.
Food Lady says I can’t eat you because you’re made of fat and gristle and you’d just give me gas, says Micron.
Hahahaha! Wait, what?, says Bodine. Whatever. You have no competitive spirit, that’s what’s wrong with you, Microbe. I need a challenge here.
Hey Jager! calls Bodine. Grasshoppa, quickly as you can . . . 
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*Kung Fu (1972-75) Back when we had four channels (2, 7, 22 & 45) to watch on television and you didn’t need a remote to change them because that’s what our parents had kids for. Well that, and adjusting the foil on the rabbit ears.
VYPMRDFV5BGP
Air conditioning doesn’t come in a can
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| Micron representing Miami Valley Pet Therapy Association at our home town annual Fine Arts Festival. |
Um, Food Lady? says Micron. Do you have a minute? I don’t want to complain. I mean, this is nice enough house and all, but I can’t find the air conditioner vent to lie on.
House? Air con . . . what? I ask. I’m rummaging in the pockets of my tote bag looking for Micron’s trading cards to set out for the kids. Micron, look around you for a sec, big guy. We’re not in a house. Do you see any walls?
Well, no but, Micron says as he looks up. We got a roof, so this has to be a house, right? A house has to have a woof, everybody knows that. And did you get a chance to smell this carpet? Seriously. Come down here and check this out. We should put this stuff in the living room at our place. Lookit, there’s crawly bugs and grass and [sniff sniffle snort] wet dirt! But it’s too hot here, doncha think? Go ask if the people will turn the air conditioner up.
He pauses and closes his eyes. Or is it turn it down?
I always did get confused on that one myself. If you turn the air up, is that to raise the temperature to warmer? Or are you turning it up to be more colder? See, even basic grammar gets boogered on this.
Micron, that wet dirt of yours is what others consider common mud, I say. See where you put your paw on my knee earlier and left a mark? Do you really want to replace the carpet in our house and have everything all mucked up and stinky? Right, never mind on that. Anyway, this is a just canopy overhead to keep the sun off us this afternoon.
Well, that’s the last thing I need a can of, says Micron, rolling his eyes. Why can’t you get me a can of air conditioning instead?
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| I am, says Micron, a remarkable piece of fine art. Out standing in my, well, you know. |
Because we’re outside, you goober, I say. As in out of doors, in the fresh air, au natural. Wait, maybe not that. Anyway, your job today is to greet people and help answer questions about pet therapy. Do you think you can avoid heat exhaustion for a little while? At least since it’s only 75 degrees and we’re in a nice shady spot with plenty of water for you working dogs.
Do you need me to drink lots of water to keep the canopy filled up? asks Micron with a straight face. Is he making a joke? I don’t get dog humor sometimes.
With the assistance of his peers, Micron does his best to make a positive impression on folk coming by our meet and greet booth for Miami Valley Pet Therapy Association. It’s just another gorgeous day at our hometown Fine Arts Festival and we found ourselves assigned a shady spot to set up our table and info material. I’m rather pleased to not have to drive far for once. This is just down the road from us, so to make up for what I’m saving in drive time I’ve volunteered to work the booth for both days of the festival. Yep, that’s how my mind works.
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| A pre-meeting among the canines before things get started up. It was a unanimous vote for turning up the AC. From top: Beamer, Zoe, Micron, Mazy |
No prob for me, really. To take on a shift both days, that is. Pretty much because the dogs do the lion’s share of the work at the booth. Sure, I’m glad to field the occasional question between bites of an ice cream sundae, but it’s Micron and his canine friends that have most the intel on what we do in pet therapy.
We human beans can talk all day about lowered blood pressure and finding that oh-feels-so-good sense of well-being when in the calm presence of a pet therapy dog. But mere talking ain’t gonna bring those happy hormones your way. You need to be there.
By that I mean, someone needs to be there to hold the leash. Because there’s not much else to be done on the human end of the thing. This kind of work is all on the canine, like Micron.
This isn’t some sort of supernatural thing, this human-animal bond happening before us as the dogs greet one person after another.
Yet it is hard to understand it on anything more than a basic level. Well, at least for me. What is it that draws two strangers together, these people and our dogs? Is their love of dogs a remnant from a positive past experience and our furries bring up wonderful memories? Sure, maybe for some.
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| Cordell and Micron are all Team Golden at the booth. |
But what about our dogs? What is it that’s rolling around in Micron’s brain that has him, fully equipped with a wagging tail and doggy smile, walking up to a individual he’s never met before?
Hi!, says Micron. I know we just met and this is crazy, but here’s my belly. Rub it maybe?*
Every blessed time. He has a golden gift, my dog. But then so does Cordell and Mazy and Zoe and Beamer and . . . well, all the dogs volunteering with mvPTa. They are doing exactly what they’re meant to be doing.
They do love their jobs. When I grab Micron’s blue bandana from the kitchen counter, he does his special Happy Dance. Wherever we’re going, whatever I’m going to ask of him, he’s sure it will be the best ever. Because he gets to go somewhere and interact with someone who is craving his presence in their life.
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| Mazy and Micron have decided to do a Kissing Booth for money. They’ll pay you up to a quarter for each lick. A full fifty cents if you’re wearing sandals. |
And I have the honor of being the chick holding the leash while this magic happens right before me. I must have done something right somewhere along this lifeline to be so blessed with this gift.
Ugh, but enough with the touchy-feely stuff, let me share something I learned in our pet therapy training. We were told – and reminded over the ten weeks of training – that our first responsibility is always the safety and well-being of our dog.
No exceptions. We are to be aware of signs of stress happening in the canine psyche of our beloved poocher. To be honest, not such as easy task in the mighty Micron. My dog will compensate for aches and pains, as well as stress. His signals are frustratingly subtle.
So during our Day Two shift at the booth, I see that Micron is not as engaging with folk. He’d rather be behind the table instead of seeking out that elusive belly rub from a stranger. And then, yep.
There ya have it. He turned away from a head pat. Even in my distracted state of talking with folk, I see that one.
Put a fork in this hot dog, he is done.
Micron, I say. Let’s go home and get you back in the air conditioning. Ok with you?
Dibs on the AC vent in the kitchen, he says.
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| Micron, photo circa July 2010. Three years ago, people. Nothing has changed here. |
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* I should apologize for that one. Really, I know.
Wordless Wednesday: What day is it?
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| Micron pauses to ponder the mysteries of the natural laws. Like gravity, fer instance. |
The mighty Micron wishes you a Happy Wordless Wednesday here in the great dog blogosphere.
Or perhaps for the likes of us as we prepare ourselves for another workday on the cube farm, we would send out Happy Hump Day greetings.
My cube partner to the due south of my office is Mike. Micron’s nickname is Mike. Micron goes to the office with me every day where we share our general space near cubemate Mike. I talk to Micron throughout the day, sometimes with cutey dog talk. Other times to correct a certain behavior.
The dog spies an anomaly outside the office window that is determined by the ever alert canine noggin as something needing immediate attention. A robust gerWOOF by Micron rings out the alarm. Meanwhile cubemate Mike is talking with someone at his desk.
Mike!, I say like I really mean it. Quiet!
[crickets chirping]
bwahahahaha. This never gets old. It just doesn’t.
So a Happy Hump Day to y’all today.
Mike Mike Mike Mike Mike, what day is it, Mike? Wuuhahaha.
Time flies at the library
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| Read to me about the golden retrievers, says Micron. |
Fly Guy vs. the Flyswatter? Really?, I say. I’m thinking this next question is going to be kinda sensitive, but yeah, here goes.
Um, does Fly Guy win? I ask.
Yeah, says our young reader, totally throwing the spoiler right out there. She turns another page in her book like this was nothing. Well, sure I asked for it, I guess. The spoiler that is.
So, I say. Because I need to know more about this Fly Guy person. Is that a good thing then? I mean, having flies in the house that talk to people is ok?
She doesn’t look up; just turns yet another page and shifts her book to show Micron a picture. I don’t know, she says.
Ugh, this is vexing. I know it’s been a while since I’ve immersed myself into children’s literature, but really. We want the flies to win now? Growing up on the farm as kids, we actually held time trials on who could swat the most of these pestilent creatures before we sat down to dinner. If one was still able to buzz after a swat, those were only granted a half point. You know, the same basic rules that most families use.
Not sure how to get my head around this Fly Guy series by Tedd Arnold about a boy named Buzz and his big eyed pet. With titles like There’s a Fly Guy in my Soup and There Was an Old Lady Who Swallowed Fly Guy, my gray matter is dredging up some not so happy childhood memories. But I don’t want to get all judgey until I have a chance to read about this thing. Trying to keep an open mind here.
It’s a popular series with the kids, I find. And in spite of the subject matter, the books are clever and funny with a format intended as a smooth transition to chapter books. Honestly, so long as kids are inspired to pick up a book to read for fun, I’ll support just about any topic in children’s literature.
Except maybe spiders. No, definitely eight legged freaky things are out. Everyone has their limits and I have to put my foot down on spiders. Real hard, too. Until you hear the harmonic symphony of the squish and muffled shriek. Nasty little buggers.
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| Naw, I’m good. If they scootch over, we got room for a couple more, I think. |
Micron and his canine peers with Miami Valley Pet Therapy Association have finished their work with the summer Paws to Read program at our local branch of the Dayton Metro Library. For the last eight weeks, these awesome dogs have listened to stories about everything from talking aardvarks to the history of fire trucks. Some weeks we enjoyed as many as forty kids wanting to read to the dogs and it wasn’t unusual to see Micron resting with his eyes closed as he took in each story as shared by the five kids sitting around him.* And it was the same for the other Paws to Read dogs, too. Good thing these are canines highly trained to listen well.
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| Sure, that’s an adorable golden puppy, says Micron. But I’ve seen cuter, right Food Lady? [wink wink] |
Although, I gotta say that Micron and his friends seem to be just plain naturals with their mad skills of engaging young readers. This lot acted like they were born to do this very thing. Fulfilling destinies here on the library carpet.
Because if there’s one single thing that Micron is proficient at, it would be tamping down carpet fibers for long periods of time. If the dog is in the room, rest assured the flooring is not going to go awry on his watch.
The Paws to Read library program is intended to encourage young readers to enjoy a good book among friendly canines. Unlike those of us who are rather judgmental about talking flies, these dogs really don’t have any concerns over plot lines or even individual reading styles of the narrators. It’s a comfortable, welcoming environment with all the happy hormones that pet therapy dogs bring with them when they enter a room.
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| Paws to Read, not paws that read — just to be clear on this. We did take a moment of wonderment about the size of Micron’s huge feet. |
We stop here to make this all about me for a minute. I have to tell you that there’s some sort of nirvanical** feeling that goes with being in the same space as dogs and children reading on purpose because they want to. Just some things that make me very happy with the world at large.
It gives me some hope for the future, it does. Well done, you parents of dog-loving children. You are awesome.
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| Fergo is retirement age, but he refuses to slow down. Not when the kids still need him, he says. |
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| No, no, keep reading. I’m listening, says Char. Just resting my eyes for a . . zzz |
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| Beamer says he’s actually a fan of Fly Guy, thank you very much. He can listen to his insect misadventures all day. |
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*Hey, I learned something new in all this reading stuff. We are no longer to refer to sitting on the floor with legs crossed as sitting Indian style. No, now it’s criss-cross applesauce. Huh, who knew?
**Right, I made that word up. So, it’s not misspelled, thank you anyway, Spell Checker program. It fits nicely though, right? I honestly can’t come up with a better word to use there.





















