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One treat at a time

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micron tongue

Mmmm, tastes like chicken fingers.

“Wait!,” said the receptionist. “Stop right there for a minute.”

Huh? Great. What did I do now?

Nothing, that’s what. But why is it, I wonder, that it is so difficult to look innocent of misdeeds, especially when you really are.

“Your dog is so handsome,” says the gatekeeper of the assisted living facility lobby. “I have dog cookies behind the desk here. Can he have one?”

Oh, that.

Micron, who was under my control and care mere seconds ago, has alerted to the one word that means so much to him.

He looks up at me, then attempts to rush the nice lady who’s waving a treat at him.

“Did ya hear that, Food Lady?” says Micron. “I’ll be going home with the new cookie lady now. It’s been fun and all, but, you know. Cookies.”

“Mike-Mike!” I cry out his cutesy nickname in spite of his dropping two points from the Adorability Meter as he Baltos me across the lobby. “Slow down, Mike! Ok, fine. Sure, but he needs to Sit for the cookie. When he’s all excited like this, you’ll want to feed him like a…”

“Ow”, says the receptionist.

“Horse.” I say. “You’ll want to feed him like a horse. Flat, open palm.”

Horse. Donkey. Dire Wolf. Land Shark. Whatever he reminds me of during these food motivated moments, it’s a lesson learned. My dog will not only turn allegiance for a dog cookie, he will do so with great passion.

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5 last minute dog-related gift ideas without leaving your house

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Don’t look now. The sun’s going down.

If you’re like me, your motto during the holiday season is “it’s not last minute until it’s Christmas Eve.”  So consider this a bit of planning ahead.

Because we’re both awesome like that.

We’ve got us a whole two sleeps before the big day. And if we have this planning gene in common, you and I, then perhaps we also share the desire to not leave the house again after surviving the holiday frenzies. Maybe never. But likely just until we run out of milk or something.

But how’s your shopping going? Do you still have someone on your list that’s still hanging out there?

You know the one.

What do you want for Christmas? you ask.

Oh, nothing, they say as they casually wave the thought away with a hand. Just your presence is enough. I have everything I need.

Does this drive you mad, too? Sure, they probably mean it. But darn it all, it just makes an awkward moment when the gift wrap is flying about the living room on Christmas morn.

And because, well, you want to gift them something since you care about them and stuff.

Does your difficult-to-gift person happen to be a fellow Lover of All Things Dog? Yeah? I have some gift ideas for you, then.

And you don’t even have to leave the house.

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