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Floundering in the rain

Hey Micron, says Euka, staring out the window. Explain this thing about human beans and water.

Whad’ya mean? asks Micron. He puts down his chew bone and walks over to see what the puppy’s looking at.  Might be squirrels, you never know.

Well, I don’t get it, says Euka.  Yesterday they went out in the big blue water bowl out there and were all laughy and stuff.  Then later they even sat inside that bubbly water bowl, the one that makes rumbly tummy noises.

Yeah, I saw ’em, says Micron. I’m still a little fluffed about not being allowed in. Right? Like, hello . . . water dogs and water. It’s a natural thing. He glances over at Jager.  For some of us.

And it’s not just the big water bowl thing, says Euka. I mean, just lookit out there. It’s raining! I want go out and jump and roll around in the squishy smells. But they’re all rushy about us doing our business and making us come right back in.  It’s like they don’t like water today.  But yesterday it was ok and  . . .

I know, says Micron. Sometimes it’s hard to put a paw on what’s going on inside those round heads. He pats the top of his own head. Since they’re missing the Knot of Knowledge up there, some of their thoughts just kinda bounce around like a pea in a balloon. You know, like your ball with the bell inside? It never makes any sense either.

But I’m not too worried, he continues. Today’s when they promised to take me down to the beach so I can carry wonderful things around in my mouth. Right, Food Lady? He looks at me with those root beer brown eyes and blinks.

Um, I say. Slight change of plans there, big guy.

Even I have a hard time reconciling why I don’t mind the pool and the hot tub, but yet worry so much about my hair in the rain. But it’s true, I don’t really feel like a beach walk on this cool, rainy day.  I feel bad, though. After checking out the sights for the past couple of days with Miss Euka, we did promise the big yeller feller a special outing of his own today. 

Easy nuff, though. It’s not hard to make this dog deliriously happy.  Sometimes just carrying a roll of paper towels around can get the Tail of Wondrous Beauty to wag of dance of joy.  Or a ride in the car can do the trick.

And . . . all is well in Micron’s world.

But what about us human beans?  More than a little rain, this is a coastal weather phenomena that leaves one with the gut feeling that we’re not gonna work on that tan any today.

As I peer out the front door in deep concentration, what to do for lunch, a critter catches my eye. My good eye, that is.  Bigger than a mouse, smaller than a bunny.  A compact dark body that seems to be clipping along at a decent, yet oddly clunky pace.

Is that a turtle? But it’s so determined and more much agile than our Eastern Box Turtles back in Ohio. I run out with the Canon for a closer inspection and now the thing looks, well, kinda not alive anymore. Dang, nature’s harsh out here in the Outer Banks. But I go all photo journalist on the situation and take photos anyway.  Its little stubby legs are splayed out, the snouty head is on on the ground with sightless eyes staring off to nowhere. 

The poor thing.  Did it just crawl out here with some last burst of energy? A turtle’s last hurrah, so to speak.  He gathered up the last vestiges of terrapin grit and fury to pull himself out of the mud, so he could shake his little turtle fist at the sky and say I was here, world!

Huh, or is this guy just messing with me? A survival technique of the ages, the old playing ‘possum ploy? So I touch the back of his shell with my big toe and . . .

Hey, now!

Do turtles growl? I think I heard a snarl or something. This fella has risen to his full height and with the chest span of a bull terrier is standing firm to challenge me. Yeah ok, I didn’t see that coming. But even worse is the eye contact.

 
Bring it on, fool.
 

I will eat your soul, says the mud turtle. And your big toe’s going down, too.

Dang, Mother Nature. That’s some harsh stuff, girlfriend.

And so not to prove myself top of the food chain, but yeah maybe a little, we’ve scheduled a date with some local fisherman and it’s time to check out what the tide brought in for these guys.

If the sea was willing, we had our hopes up to score us some fresh flounder. We talked earlier with Vince, a super nice guy, who comes from a long line of Southern Outer Banks fisherman in his family. And we met Aaron, Jr. who was at hand to take pity on these out-of-towners and mercifully clean said fresh flounder for us.

We don’t have the tools to clean fish at the rental, was my claim. Could you help us out with that?

Aaron, Jr. will do that for ya, we’re told. There’s no one better, they say.  We select some fine flounder to fillet, which means Aaron the Third held up some fish and I said, yeah those look good. 

Can I be trusted to recognize a good flounder? No. The answer is no. The fish were big, flat, had both eyes on the same side of their head and weren’t moving anymore. And that, to me, is Good Eatin’ Flounder criteria. We are completely at the mercy of Aaron III. Who, it turns out, is a pretty decent guy, too.

I’m not kidding when I say the next hour was one of the top highlights of our week on Cedar Island.  We’ll set you up with a mess of fish and a load of bullshit today, says Aaron, Jr. as he entertains us with yet another story in that distinct Southern Outer Banks dialect. Which is different on every island down here, we’re told. The dialect, that is. Not sure about the bullshit, but it makes me happy believing that’s unique, too.

In all the talking and scaling, we came out of there with the intended flounder, some spot and a couple of trout. And a bunch of blue crab claws. A list of sundry items, as recommended by professional fishermen, to get from the island’s only convenience store was pretty handy to have for our impending fish fry and crab boil. 

Oh, is it still raining?  No matter, y’all.  We’re pan frying fresh flounder served with a side of steamed crab. It’s a good day here on Cedar Island.

We can do the beach another day.


 

More photos to this story and others from our Three Dog Vacation are in an album on the Raising a Super Dog Facebook page.  Click here to see more images of our adventures.

 
 
 


Wordless Wednesday: Base Tan

I don’t know, says Euka.  I’ve been in the sun all afternoon and just can’t get past this base tan.

A furry reminder from Miss Euka to watch for the next installment of her tales of derring-do. Or what I refer to as our family vacation on Cedar Island. Coming soon.

Attack of the Ten Foot Sea Spider

Cedar Island – Day 1

Ow! I cry.  Gosh darn, it Micron!  You idjit!*

In Dog Training 101, one of the first bullet points to be emphasized is the need for consistency.  Our relationship with our dog is at its best when expectations are clear, right?. Like, Ok Miss Puppy Dog, you can jump on the sofa when invited. See, it’s understood that a command is always given to provide this privilege.

But not so good is relying on vague understandings such as, Alrighty then Mister Spotted Dog, you can sit in my lap anytime you feel like, except when you smell like you rolled around in a rotting raccoon carcass. Yeah, I’m looking at you, Jager.



Let us out! We want to come back in again.

I’m fully aware of this canine mindset on Sunday evening as we settle down for our first overnight in the vacation rental. At home, the mighty Micron has full approval to be on our bed. Anytime and for any reason, no questions asked.  He’s a beloved pet and we enjoy his company.

Two problems with the suite rental at Cedar Island, however.  The primary issue at hand is respecting the owner’s request for no dogs on the bed and furniture.  That is difficult to explain to Micron. 

Here’s your dog bed, I tell him, pointing to the fluffy mat on the floor. Sleep tight, don’t let the bed fleas bite.**  The big dog lies down and relaxes.  All is well.

Until the crack of dawn shines through the curtains.

Hey Food Lady! Micron says. It’s morning again! I LOVE new days, don’t you? Hey, I need to go outside! Wake up wake up wake up!

And he jumps on the bed. This is the second of the two issues. It’s different than our bed at home; sitting much higher*** and I’m in a different spot than the dog brain’s Consistency Requirement allows to process.  This realization hits me like a brick as a baseball mitt paw lands right on me.

By right on me, I mean he smacks me right in the tender eyeball. Yowza. This seeing-stars experience is enhanced as he tries to gain purchase on me while sliding back off the bed.

At the bathroom mirror, I’m assessing the damage to the money maker**** with a surprising amount of vanity that I usually don’t possess.

Are you ok? asks The Husband. 

I think so, I call back.  Just don’t be wearing a stained sleeveless t-shirt today, cuz folk will think I sassed you real good last night.

That’s not funny, he says.

It kinda is, I say.

And we begin Day One of vacation with dogs.

Pelican’s Rest

We rolled into the Pelican’s Rest vacation rental late on Sunday night, all of us road weary and exhausted from the long drive.  Cedar Island is rather remote, so more stars in the sky than street lights by the quiet roads.  I thought I saw water as we neared the suite, but couldn’t be sure.  So, Monday morning I was ready to set my remaining eye on the local sights.



Drawing the line in the sand, so to speak. Jager will not get
any closer to the water. This is him being brave. He wants
you to know that.

This place is just one wonderful surprise after another.  The generous deck overlooks the bay, cool enough.  But even better is that it’s gated so we can let the dogs roam and sun themselves without worrying about that random canine roaming that they are wont to do.

A large pool, a hot tub, a gas grill. Check, check and check. All private and just for us. And oh so quiet here. Laughing seagulls, lapping waves, the wind in the tops of the trees and some weird bird with a trill that sounds a little like an old fashioned ringing phone.

None of the golf carts of Myrtle Beach campgrounds or screaming kids. Or moms hollering for their kids. (A lingering memory of a campground is a love-lorn adolescent fella vigorously calling for his crush, Anastasia, in the deepest southern accent I’ve heard to date. That’s a full three . . . second. . . name, now.) No, we just had that one chick here cursing at her big yellow dog, but was only for a minute or two and then it stopped.

The price of this sans tourist environment?  Well, the nearest grocery is about a half hour drive and it apparently took most of the restaurants with it.  We’re gonna have to head out to get some basic essentials.  The island’s convenience store nets us coffee, cereal and such miscellaneous and sundry items. And somehow we get out of there with about forty bucks hitting the credit card. So we decide to drive to neighboring Beaufort where rumor has it there’s a Piggly Wiggly.

But lunch first 

We rely on the GPS to help us make the completely random decision of Snapperz Restaurant in Morehead City for lunch.


Euka poses by the custom mosaic fireplace at
Snapperz.

The server is looking at me funny, I say. I know I’m just being sensitive about this I-walked-into-a-door shiner I’m sporting , but still. I can see her watching us from the bar, obviously wondering if she should offer up the wine menu or if perhaps it was a reckless affair with a mango margarita that brought me to this state in the first place.  I gotta come up with a better story than my dog stepped on my face.

We could get you an eyepatch, says My Favorite Kid. You could go with a pirate theme this week.

Say arrrr, says The Husband.

R, I say, not really feeling it. I need a parrot or a mojito or something. Although I’m kinda liking the eyepatch idea. That sounds just a little awesome. Yeah, I could growl my r’s effectively with a macaw, an eyepatch and a mojito, I think. 

I dunno, maybe it requires rum.

But sadly none to be had this fine afternoon. So, later fortified with non-Yankee sweet tea, crab and shrimp cake burgers, all local seafood, we’re ready to see what’s what with this sea town of Morehead City.

Greeting a young admirer as we depart
the restaurant.
 

Attack of the 10 Foot Sea Spider

The Husband pulls into a parking lot near some piers.  Whatcha got in mind for this stop? I ask.  

You said you wanted a photo of Euka with the giant crab, he says. 

Heh. Did I actually say that out loud? I wonder. I’ve been working from home some lately and it has me concerned that I’m turning somewhat feral, talking to myself and all. So yeah, time to switch on the internal filter, girl.

It’s true that I did want to introduce Euka to the giant Spider of the Sea, the inflatable version. We saw this eye-catching advertisement for an aquarium as we were driving to the restaurant earlier. This is a training opportunity, y’all — The Novel Object Exposure.

I’ve seen dogs raise their hackles and bark at a trash bag stuck to a chain link fence. And step back when encountering a helium-filled balloon floating at their eye level. There are some unnatural things that don’t make a clean process through a dog’s instinct driven noggin.  A service pup in training needs some early exposure to help things along here.

This air infused bug is not only making an odd hissing sound brought on by the generator inflating the thing, but it’s swaying in the wind as well.  Has Euka seen such a creature in her eight months of life?  Of course not.  I’ve been around a lot longer than her and I’ve never encountered a ten foot balloon crab either.

But we stroll to the sea monster like this is just another walk on a sunny day.  No hint of confrontation, just la-la-la normal stuff here. My Favorite Kid has the leash so I can observe and direct if the puppy neurons click to a fight or flight response.

Or if this is just another photo op to satisfy the Food Lady. Which is where we end up.  Euka barely gives the crab a sniff, can I chew on this?, and does a solid Sit between the slowly waving crab claws.

This event does not ruffle the courageous Euka one little bit. She’s more interested in the onlookers at our photo shoot.  Two older gentlemen are waiting on the sidewalk for me to finish, like this is something that they see every day. I don’t know, maybe they do around here.

And we take it one step further. Well done, little girl.



No prob. I can take this thing down.

Down by the water, I know there’s an official seaworthy word for those things in the background sticking up from the pier. But I’m from landlocked Ohio and we don’t have such fancy stuff.  But I do want to draw your attention to the fact that there’s a seagull sitting atop each one.  And they’re each of them watching the dog with ill intent.

Imagine thought balloons over them with “Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.” like in Finding Nemo.***** 

More salty dog adventures coming up. A stormy day, an enraged mud turtle, and I’m considering posting a photo of me on a horse. Still thinking that one through.

________________________________________________________
*Paraphrased. 
**A manner of speech, that.  Micron doesn’t have fleas.
***I’m a tenuous five foot, three inches. Each night, I’m climbing into this behemoth bed in a manner reminiscent of a chubby Gollum scaling Mt. Doom.  It’s not becoming.
****My face, the money maker.  Sarcasm, folks.
*****Finding Nemo (2003). The scene is pretty much like Seagulls: Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. [repeatedlyNigel: Oh would you just shut up? You’re rats with wings!

_________________________________________________________

ADDENDUM:

It was after writing this post, I recalled a dream I had that starred, for-real, a menacing giant crab. The fact that this dream occurred before vacation was more than a little interesting to me.  So per usual, I brought it up with my Psychology/Sociology double major college grad and favorite kid for evaluation.

I like to think that my vivid, and sometimes disturbing, dreams are filled to brimming with symbolism.  Elevators that are difficult to operate and never take me to my destination are obviously a clue that I should stop eating Chinese take-out so close to bedtime. But when consulting with my college grad, the usual response is something like That’s really messed up, Ma.

But I try again. So I’m at a beach, I tell him. with a friend, but I don’t remember who it was now. We’re wading out of the water and back to the beach when the surf rises and a two-story tall slow-motion wave appears behind us. I look back and through the water I see a giant crab, not walking towards us, but being pushed by the water our way.

My friend and I start to run, but the giant crab reaches out a claw and grabs me.  The thing is pulling me towards his maw when I wake up.  I can still feel my fear even thinking about it now. What d’ya think it means?

I see your problem, Ma, he says.

Really, I say.  What?

You need slower friends, he says.

True story, y’all.

Wordless Wednesday: Save yourselves. I got this.

No worries, says Euka.  I got things under control here. No really, this crab is right where I want him.

A photo preview from our next blog post on our road trip vacation with three dogs. Adventures and acts of derring do coming up later this week!

What’s it like to vacation with three big dogs, you ask? You ever unpeel a banana to find a dog hair inside?  Yeah, it’s a lot of that kind of thing.

Since you’ve been gone


Well, for the love of fish sticks, says Bodine.  There you are. Glad to see you finally remembered that I need to be fed, Chickie.  Where the [expletive deleted] have you been all day?

All day? I ask.  Bodine, we’ve been gone a week, dude.  Although I do appreciate the warm welcome home.  I peek over at the cat food bowls. And your bowl’s full of kibble, kiddo.  Why the grief over hunger pangs?

Interesting story, says Bodine. You should write a book.

Bodine waddles over to the food bowl.  Well [crunch crunch], he says, spewing kibble out the sides of his mouth, I had to ration myself.  I didn’t know if you were coming back.  Hey, by the way, Chickie, I left you a remembrance of me in the litter box.  Go fish that out will ya?  I’m heading that way next.

Sure thing, I say.  Just let me set my suitcase down first, ok?  I walk over to check the answering machine for messages.  So, Bodine are you telling me that you didn’t get fed while we were gone? Here, I’ll call Lisa to  see if she ran into any problems last week.

Naw, says Bodine.  I didn’t say that. I just said I was [burp] pacing myself.  Some Kibble Chick came by every day to pay homage to me.  And I gotta say, she was a lot better about keeping the litter box clean than my usual . . . he pauses to look up at me.  Wait, did you say a week?

Bodine, my love, I say. First of all, Lisa is a professional pet sitter, not a Kibble Chick to pay homage to the benevolent ruler of Sword House. And secondly, we were all gone. All of us. For a whole week.  Even the dogs. So you just started to miss us yesterday?

That’s it!, he slaps his forehead with a paw.  The dog bed’s missing!  I knew something was different around here.  You brought it back with you, right?  I’m gonna want a nap after I recycle this little snack.  Oh, take a minute to wipe off the counters next.  They’re absolutely covered with fur and it’s messing with my Chi. Honestly, it’s like I’m the only one who notices how you can’t keep up with this mess. Like, um, the litter box. Still waiting on that mcnugget removal, you know.

Really? I ask. That’s your response, is it? You’re not even curious about where we’ve all been the last few days? Bodine? Hello?

Huh? says Bodine.  Are you still talking?  What? What’s that look for?  Fine, but you know what they say about curiosity.  It doesn’t end well for we of the feline persuasion. No prob, chickie, I’ll take one for the team, but you owe me now. Go ahead and tell me your bedtime story while I stretch out here on the counter . . . [oof] ok, ok, the cat bed then. Right, Once Upon a Time . . . you can take it from here.



Nice view, says Jager. But I’m not getting any closer to that water stuff.

It was a lovely vacation, I say with a sigh. We drove to Cedar Island; it’s a remote area of the southern outer banks of North Carolina. We were right by the bay, no crowds or touristy stuff to deal with. A glass of chilled white in the evenings while watching the seagulls from the deck.  Oh, but the mosquitoes were pretty bad. We had to use bug spray if we were sitting outside for a while.

Uh huh, uh huh, nods Bodine. He pauses in his post-dinner cleaning ritual. Interesting stuff.  You should write a book.

I ignore the biting feline sarcasm and continue.  The dogs had a blast, of course.  New smells to discover and all.  Micron especially enjoyed the place; he really loved the water. Jager plotted in his terrier brain on how to catch a seagull and we had some wonderful opportunities to socialize Euka in the area. Oh, there was a storm that came through one day that changed our plans, but in a good way. And we saw wild horses and a wild cow. I don’t know, though. The cow might not have been wild, she seemed nice enough. We met some local fishermen and a lady who apologized for being part Yankee, like it was a bad thing. Which I guess it kinda is down there.  I found out mud turtles have an attitude. Is that a turtletude, then? Oh yeah, just wait till I tell you about when Euka stole my toothbrush  . . . Bodine?

zzzzzz[snert], says Bodine.

Ok, sure, I say.  Let’s save the stories for another time. I want to get some unpacking done and we can sort through the photos later. Sleep tight, little furball.  You’ll need your rest now that the dogs are back to torment.
 


Where are the dog paddles for the canoe? snorts Micron.